Pros and cons of having a second child

My boys are 10 and 6.

That's a 4 year age gap between them.

In the first few years of my firstborn's life, he was always the priority. We would spend money endlessly on toys, cute clothes, bring him out to play, etc. But something felt... missing.

He had no one to play with. 💔

When I got pregnant with my 2nd child, I was ecstatic, knowing that he finally has a sibling to play with. But is that all there is to having a second child? Born into the world just to be a companion for the firstborn?

But 6 years in, they have grown up together, fought alot together (boys will be boys 🙄), and most importantly, they learned alot from each other.

No regrets having a second child. 💑🏻

But for anyone considering expanding the family, these are the considerations you have to take note of:

[𝗮𝗴𝗲 𝗴𝗮𝗽: 𝟬-𝟮 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘀]

Pros

✨ Both kids will never be alone when growing up

✨ Both kids can share the same routine (sleep/nap/milk)

✨ The older child is less likely to feel jealous because they still can't understand complex emotions at that age

✨ Your body can still remember the essential duties during the newborn stage

✨ Your kids can wear matching outfits and pretend they are twins (my fav!)

Cons

💥 You will feel tired all the time x999

💥 Extra time spent on each task - feeding, changing diaper, putting to sleep

💥 Pay double for everything - bottles, pram, baby cot, clothes, school fees

[𝗮𝗴𝗲 𝗴𝗮𝗽: 𝟮-𝟰 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘀]

Pros

✨ Your kids are still able to grow up together

✨ They can share the same interests

✨ The best time to teach the older sibling positive values such as sharing, caring and helping out

✨ Save money by using older sibling's hand-me-downs

Cons

💥 Divided attention will definitely affect older sibling

💥 Older sibling might experience new emotions such as jealousy, neglect, feeling wronged, guilt

💥 Expect lots of mess around the house

[𝗮𝗴𝗲 𝗴𝗮𝗽: 𝟰 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘃𝗲]

Pros

✨ More 1-to-1 time with each child

✨ Older sibling less likely to feel threatened or jealous of the arrival of younger sibling

✨ There's someone to look up to for younger sibling

✨ Older sibling can help out with basic chores around the house

✨ Older sibling is mostly self-sufficient in daily tasks, allowing you to focus on newborn

Cons

💥 You need to relive the dreaded newborn/breastfeeding stage all over again

💥 Each child has their own interest and preferred entertainment, limiting the options for bonded family activities

💥 You need to use different parenting methods for each child

💥 Having to buy baby stuff all over again

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