❤️‍🔥 8 ‘dates’ but I’m still not in love (1/2)

I prefer to call them meetings, is it really a date if you’re not interested? Semantics but in my mind it’s never a date until we’re in love.

Some context - we matched on CMB, he’s Indian I’m Chinese, he’s a relatively newly minted Dr.

☝️Tamoya Udon & Tempura SingPost Centre

Sunday lunch it was.

💭 Why is he sitting on the inside (the side with the back rest) controversial opinion but gentlemen tend to let the girls sit on the inside or at least ask where they prefer, brushed it aside because he arrived first & it would’ve been awkward for him to sit outside while waiting.

He seemed a lil nervous but not too nervous. I don’t like nervous guys 🫢

We ordered, he got the bill.

His story of how he came to Christ struck me. It was like God called him through multiple near death incidents. As he narrated his stories, I could also see how his life was transformed, from one of the world to one more of Christ.

We got dessert after. I shopped a little and he tagged along.

✅ truly serious about his rs with God

✅ can talk

✅ generous enough to get the bill

✅ patient enough to wait while I shop

✅ not one dimensional, has some crazy reckless life experiences but is transformed

🔶 lil shy

🔶 not v gentlemanly

🔴 no red flags

✌️Sin Heng Kee Porridge

2nd meet was another Sunday lunch.

He shared more about his work. I love hearing Dr stories, the things they see can be so bizarre - literally patients bleeding out, fam members fighting over what sort of treatment is best for their elderly parent, cute old aunties who show appreciation. Very real, humbling and scary at the same time.

I shared about my crazy family.

✅ passionate about what he does

✅ doesn’t seem to mind the madness in my home

🤟Bedok 85 Market

3rd meet we talked about missionaries. I could see that he was keen to do mission work in future. It was a good point of reflection, are my priorities God’s priorities?

He also shared about his ideal fam, dad brings home the bread, mum stays home to take care of kids. This way, both are doing what they are skilled at doing and so will appreciate what the other has done 🔶🔴🔶🔴🔶🔴🔶🔴 controversial! I have so many thoughts on this point but I shall leave it for another post!!!

He asked if I was still on CMB, I said yes and no - ded such a lawyer answer. I didn’t delete the app but practically speaking I don’t have so much time to meet too many ppl at once.

There’s no clear direction of where we were headed anw 🤔

🖖 Chinatown Complex

4th meet was dinner after work. I recall that the convo was poor. It was his first meal for the day so he was just gobbling food.

We barely talked during the meal and talked about some inconsequential things after while taking a walk around the area.

I even noted to myself that our interactions feel v bro, not sure if I could fall in love at this rate 🫢🔶 the vibes never come close to a date, zero flirting, zero compliments.

🖐️ Picolino Orchard

Still, I agreed to a 5th meet. Convo was v work related cauz I was deciding between 2 job offers. He didn’t seem to have much advice to offer.

I enjoyed the food a lot but my mind checked out, this is going nowhere, we should just be friends.

A part of me is also relieved that it’s going nowhere cauz I wasn’t sure about him at all.

💭 Our convos don’t seem to draw us closer. He doesn’t share enough for me to want to open up more.

✈️ Sometime after this 5th meet, he went to Penang. We were texting daily when suddenly he just didn’t reply my last question - how’s Penang? 🙋‍♀️

Did he just disappear from the face of this earth???

TBC

#coffeemeetsbagel #dating #datingapp