Being an only child - am I a spoiled brat?

Being an only child, I've heard a lot about the ✨only child syndrome✨ where people think being an only child makes you selfish, proud, anti-social etc etc. There has been research done on this and the 'syndrome' is unfounded. Ultimately, your upbringing and environment shapes who you are as an adult.

Growing up, when I tell people I have no siblings, their immediate reaction is "oh you must be a spoiled brat". Of course some phrase it nicer but the assumption is the same. They think I'm used to getting a lot of attention and hate to share. Or they think I'm a sad lonely child. But... am I?

Assumption 1: Only children get a lot of attention

Some definitely do but personally, I lack attention hahaha I'm an only child bc my parents don't have time to care for another kid. One was their max. They were both really busy with work when I was growing up so I was cared for by aunts and grandparents. When I was still very young and couldn't take care of myself, I hung out at their office and was left to my own devices. Once I was old enough, I stayed home alone. My parents will come back late at night so I'm mostly left alone.

Assumption 2: Only children are lonely

Okay reading my POV on the previous point definitely made me sound lonely 🥲 But I didn't feel lonely at all. I loved being alone and would dread if aunts and grandparents came to check in on me at home. I do enjoy their company but I preferred to be alone. It gave me time to quietly do my homework and watch TV without commentary. I also like to lie down and stare at the ceiling, no thoughts head empty (making myself sound depressed but I'm not I truly enjoyed alone time). Of course I had friends to play with, I'll hang out with the neighbourhood kids so I wasn't anti-social and I do enjoy socialising. Luckily none of them were bad influences.

Assumption 3: Only children are independent

Okay this is the only assumption I resonate with bc I grew up doing most things myself. If I'm home alone I gotta know how to take care of myself. I think this made me keep things to myself as an adult. If I'm unwell, I deal with it myself instead of seeking others for comfort. My parents will always scold me for not telling them I'm sick but I'm always like what can you do about it? 😬

Assumption 4: Only children are selfish

Some definitely are bc they never had to share things or compromise but I was always taught to share. As an adult now, I put others' needs before my own, which is good but also bad bc I neglect my own needs. I think bc I had no siblings to share things with, my parents were more strict on teaching me to share and care for others.

There are a lot more assumptions for sure, but this post is getting too long so I'm only sharing the top assumptions I always get when people find out I have no siblings. I only wished I had siblings once in my life bc I was jealous that my friends had someone their age to live with instead of adults. But I got over it real quick bc I enjoy my peace 😅

I hope that this post resonates with other only children or if you're a parent with only 1 kid, don't worry, they'll turn out fine like every other adult with siblings.

#SocialDiscussion #onlychild