God Lessons Part 1: Overcoming Jealousy

Yesterday, I met a friend for lunch. She was sharing all of her joys she’s experiencing at this time in her life. I was so happy for her! They just bought a house, they have great credit, no debt, and a plethora of savings, etc, etc. All of this made me so happy to hear! I love seeing God bless others and sharing their testimonies with other people who need encouragement.

HOWEVER, in the quiet of the car ride home after I left the café, I couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy about her and her fiancé’s financial position. It wasn’t an encouragement to me at all, as it normally would have been. A small voice tickled the back of my mind as it whispered,

“Why do they have it so easy? How come you had to be out of work for 5 months of your 6 month engagement, causing deep debt and zero savings with no hope of buying a house anytime soon? Why does this have to be so much harder for you?”

I was surprised at myself so I pushed down those words, reminding myself that I don’t say “you” when I’m talking to myself. That was the enemy sewing seeds.

Then again today, another friend called — a couple that is close to both my husband and I — to tell us some great news: They just bought another house! I was SOOO happy for them!

But then... it hit again. After we hung up the phone, a heavy weight settled on my heart. The whispers from yesterday repeated again, louder, in my mind. I was jealous!

I want a house so badly… Renting is sucking up all our funds and money is just hard right now. But I HATE being jealous and want to be able to celebrate with the people I love when something good happens to them! It shows ungratefulness to God, who has given us everything we need and more than we deserve. So, I asked my husband to pray for me. Afterwards, I felt a pull to get into the word. God IMMEDIATELY sent me to Genesis 4.

Do you know what the title of Genesis 4 is?

"Cain Murders Abel"

for about a half a second, I thought I misunderstood; until it dawned on me… Cain was jealous of Abel.

Genesis 4:6

"Then the Lord said to Cain, 'Why are you furions? And why are you dispondent? If you do what is right, won't you be accepted? But if You do not do what is right, sin is crouching at the door. Its desire if for you, but you must rule over it.’”

Then, God led me to Matthew 5: 21-26. (too long for this post, please go read). The conviction was palpable.

Why AM I being despondent? Don't I know that by doing what is right and offering up my life to the Lord He will gladly accept me with open arms? But if am focused on my sisters’ acceptance / rewards like Cain was with Able, the offring of my life will be corrupted by the envy and jealousy of my heart. And if I do that, sin is crouching of the door and will cause me to be subject to judgement because of the budding anger inside me. But I must rule over it. I can do that by earnestly thanking God (Gal. 5:26), celebrating my brothers' and sisters’ blessings (Ro. 12:15), and looking for ways to offer myself up to Jesus (Ro. 12:1)

#jealousy #alwayslearning #conviction #spiritualwarfare #life #wellnessjourney #mentalwellness