About me {A Marine}

I joined the Marine Corps in 2016. I loved every second of it. Sure there were hard times, shitty moments, and lots of downs, but nothing has been harder than getting out. I got out at the peak of the pandemic when they were making the vaccination mandatory. I was in my second term and on recruiting duty. I have nothing against those who got the vaccine (my mom did, my husband did, my best friend did) but because of my own health concerns and limitations I know about my own body, I decided to deny receiving it. This was one of the hardest decisions of my life because for the past 6 years I had been planning on staying in the Marine Corps until retirement. I knew it would be a hard transition, and I have to admit, I have it easier than others since my husband is still active duty army and I get to keep a light foot in the world I used to live in, but it’s been two years and I still struggle with being a civilian. My closest friends are all Marines, either still serving or also out, but it’s so hard not being around like minded individuals all the time. There’s some things that can’t be explained, the friendships, the camaraderie, the lifestyle, the humor, the work ethic. It’s so tough working in a civilian environment with people who can’t act like adults or even try to find their own solutions to problems when I previously lived in a world where you could task an 18 year old kid with figuring out a solution to a problem that could save thousands of dollars, save lives, or simply just take care of themselves. I still struggle finding a place I feel like I make a difference, feel like I have a purpose, and feel like the people I work with aren’t just coworkers. Every day I miss the life I used to live, and I’m not saying I’m ungrateful for the life I have now, it’s just very different. It’s difficult feeling like you aren’t being your true self or living to your full potential.

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