Arguing is Normal

I’m 36 and have been married for 13 years now and 1 thing I’ve learned is that arguing is normal.

You will always have fights. New issues will always come up so don’t expect perfection, just progress.

Here are 4 things you can do before it escalates.

1.DONT POINT FINGERS - Instead of pointing out what your partner did wrong, Make “I” statements: “I feel like this when….”

2.HAVE A “SPEAKER/LISTENE” CONVO - 1 person speaks while the other listens. Then the other person repeats back what the 1st person said to make sure they understood what they were saying.

(keep in mind - Be considerate and keep your statements short so they have time to remember what you're saying and are able to repeat it back to you.)

3.BE PATIENT- the other person may not understand and repeat back what you said correctly the 1st time.

4.SET A TIME TO COME BACK TO THE ARGUMENT - if one person seems to be getting mentally exhausted, you have to end it right then or else you'll get nowhere.

Set a time and date to come back to the argument and finish the discussion when you're both clear headed and rested.

THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND

• Think before you speak

• If you’re getting frustrated, take a deep breath - inhale and exhale

• Watch your tone

• Don’t raise your voice

• Speak the way you want to be spoken to

These tips are for the both of you. If you both implement these, then you’ll have healthy arguments.

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