[ STRICT VS CONTROLLING PARENTING ] | send helplol

Hii. Just want to talk about the rules my parents have for me. For context: im turning 20 this year and in uni year 1 comp science.

1) Not allowed to leave the house unless academic reasons.

- They say I can go out during holidays but uh I wanted to go café on a Saturday and I couldn’t get permission? So..

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2) No wearing anything above the knee, no stomach showing, no sleeveless clothing unless with jacket/coat over it.

- Deadass have to raise my hands before I leave the house to make sure no skin can be seen. If have then I have to wear singlet but ya

- If I want to wear any clothing like that, then I want to attract men to look at me

3) Not allowed to dance(separate post made) but also not allowed to have CCAs or go for events. Basically point 1.

4) Not allowed to post on social media. But err im doing tiktok and lemon8 now oop

- I am lucky that they don’t do phone checks anymore teehee

Though they do have my phone password, access to my email and google calendar. So basically I have nothing to hide and I am very transparent with my life so

5) Not allowed to talk to boys. Group projects/school then have to la. But nothing more than acquaintances.

- This one idgaf. I don’t date tho that’s too risky

6) Curfew!! On the rare times I can hang out with my friends, im only allowed like 4 hours of outdoor time. If I go 10am, be home by 4pm. Latest is be home by 6pm.

- Okay but I always come up with reason to push to like 7pm cus idw leave my friends also:( but latest 7 cus I choose life dfkdjf

7) Not allowed to online shop. If I want something, I need to request my mom and she’ll buy me for me if approved.

- Ngl retail therapy keeps me happy these days. I still do it anway. Grateful for shoppee self pick up collection point hehe.

8) Allowance Is $100 but hmm I think its okay considering I do nothing with my life. That’s also how 100 was decided. Cus theres nothing for me to spend on so I don’t need money.

- This doesn’t include transport fees! I use concession pass

9) Not allowed to wear eyeshadow and eyeliner. The rest can. Only natural makeup basically cus anything else = I want to attract men. Not even allowed to let my hair down for the same reason. Always tie up or half up half down

10) Not allowed to study outside house because I might “lie and go hang out with my friends”.

- Damn.. ok

I deadass sit in my house for 95% of my life. I think im gg insane kekeke. Recently I snuck out to film dance cover tho,, very risky very scary cus I had to fake an official school email lol. I got away with it 😊 I have to take such risks to atleast be happy.

WHY THESE RULES? Tbh my uni sem1 was ideal. I was very involved in school and I met my friends. I want to go back haha. Things changed after my dance recital in dec(my second post). Went from not allowed to dance to not allowed to do anything. I made the mistake of confessing I hate my degree and im not thriving in it, in like week 5 of the sem. So now im the worst daughter ever because I love dance and hate comp science. So these rules are to “bring me on the right track” aka hate dance and love comp science 🫣🫣 aka never. Might be deported in June too rip, have to do comp science over there in india

“You want to drop out and join mediacorp” “Go beg” and such things in my house are very common. I don’t even want to drop out I just want to change to business☹

Both my parents are comp science people so to them, only comp science = success. Everything else = homeless, poor people idk.

Like imagine being a degree that u hate&isn’t suited for your strengths + not allowed to do the one thing youre passionate about + not allowed to meet friends + even go outside + constantly checking on your location to make sure youre on your way home.

Im always the kind of person who doesn’t “want to air my dirty laundry” (thats the right term right?lol) haha. But im sick of bottling up my feelings. I don’t confide in anyone and school counsellors don’t rlly care they just want to do their job.

Im sure theres more kids like me out there, please reach out HAHAHA jiayous

OHNO THE TITLE…. soo strict vs controlled. Please parents out there, respect your children like human beings and not just little pets you gave birth too. We are individuals with our own opinions, interests and talents, do not ignore them and force them into your own ideology it’s suffocating. Strict parenting is okay cuz we just want our kids to be safe. But there’s always a line to not cross ;-;