Childhood trauma still haunts me at 31

#safespace #lemon8challenge

Losing my Father at 7 really did it for me because after that I pretty much gave up on everything that was good for me! School, Relationship with my mom (I took my anger out on her blamed her for him getting killed) I isolated myself for so long and still find myself doing so 🥹 because I had no father and no real male figures in my life I went looking for male attention! I I was also SA by two family members a man and a woman! I have two children of my own and I don’t trust a SOUL around my babies ! My trauma has ruined person relationships! I can’t keep a relationship to save my life because I’m always thinking negative 🥹🥹 I don’t mean to… it’s just my past really messed me up and I don’t want that for my kids….. being a single mother is already hard for both me and my kids and that’s enough trauma for them alone ! I don’t wanna add to that!!! I wish I had more people to talk to that can relate and understand me #chatwithme #growinguptoxic #trauma #grief