3 Chronic Illnesses (and counting) BUT ALIVE

It’s been a tough past 1-2 years with my health being unstable and having to delay my dreams, but my perseverance knows no boundaries cuz this dum dum doesn’t know the words “give up” when hurdles are thrown at her XD

I would like to take this chance to bring awareness to some of the general issues the chronic illness community goes through in Singapore, including those battling mental health illnesses as they are considered chronic conditions as well.

For reference, my diagnosis’ are Lupus (SLE), Idiopathic Hypersomnolance, and Bipolar (II) and I’ve been living with it for at least 2 years each and 6 years for bipolar. Other than the fact that having to live with these conditions suck, let’s look at other aspects of living that are affected by these that most people without much sickness in their whole lives have to go through:

1) Education: Having been best friends with hospitalisations and appointments means missing out on important exams and classes, which means losing out on important information needed to pass modules. While it might start out as a small problem initially, 1 class adds up to another, and soon you aren’t able to catch up on a lot of topics.

Not being in your tip top condition also means you can’t absorb as much knowledge as your peers, which will cause you to fall behind even more. This is especially true if you have conditions that take away your energy to sustain your activities throughout the day. Maybe let’s say you overworked yourself by brisk walking the previous day. Good luck, you probably won’t have enough energy to last you to the end of the next day to let you even lift your fork to eat dinner. I sound like i’m exaggerating but i’m not kidding. It has happened multiple times as someone who has gone through multiple depressive episodes thanks to my bipolar, and eventually having it worse due to my SLE.

This eventually leads to you not finishing your assignments, and again looping to you not being able to catch up and eventually having to take gap year. And after coming back from gap year, your body is unable to adjust back to the stress so fast, hence the cycle repeats, and eventually you either retain, or drop out until your next plan in life.

2) Dignity: As the cycle repeats, people start looking down to you and start treating you in 2 opposite ends of the spectrum. One group will treat you like an idiot who can’t achieve anything in life and is a lazy good for nothing who uses their illness as an excuse, regardless of how much effort or explanation you try to give. The other try to pamper you and will not let you step out of your comfort zone as they don’t believe you should do anything to “harm yourself” for “your safety”. Choose your poison. Of course there’s a third group, but those group of people are so hard to find, and you better treasure them well if you do find them.

If you have an invisible disability, that makes the first group of people even more prevalent in your life. As much as I appreciate SMRT and SG Gov for trying to educate and take steps in catering to those with visible and invisible disabilities, I feel like more can be done in terms of education, at least among the youths so if we can’t do anything about the elderly, we can start a new culture of kindness. Afterall, kids reciprocate their elders’ teachings.

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Partners, friends and family of anyone whom you know has chronic illness, you don’t have to start with the whole pity/sympathy game with them. If you’d truly would like to help them, just ask what they’d like from you. Most of the time, they may not need help at the moment, but do let them know that you are willing to help them if the need arises (within your capabilities of course, don’t burn yourself out as well). Encourage them to be independent, this can make them feel happier about their progress in their healing journey. Not everyday is going to be a linear progress, some days will just not be those days. But what’s important is that there is a support system that encourages independence and healing, and at the end, just listening. If you’re confused, maybe all you have to do is listen.

#RealTalk #chronicillnesslife #chronicillness #supportandmotivate #stayalive