Things I wish I knew before go into labour 🐣

⚠️WARNING: Brutal, unfiltered documentation by mother of 3

Highly recommended read for husband too, to be familiar with the process and be prepared to make medical decisions on wife’s behalf.

1️⃣Water Birth option 🌊

As I was in preparation of my first birth, I was quite keen on water birth as it seemed like the easiest and most natural way to deliver the baby. At the time of my search many years ago there wasn’t much information on this and I was afraid of the high cost hence I did not select this option. My ideal choice was C-sec as I do not want to go through the long and ‘traumatic’ pushing I saw in videos but my gynae convinced me to go natural. I regretted this choice.

2️⃣ Epidural given

- only after their assessment of Dilation

I prepared myself by reading blogs and watching birth videos on youtube; c-sec, natural and water birth. All these did not prepare me for my own dramatic delivery. I had spotting + contractions so I timed myself and estimated that I still had long way to go. This varies for everyone, for me I was still able to walk as the contractions were very mild and far apart. Told hub to get a 1hr nap while I went to take the longest shower, re-check my delivery bag and did my make-up. We reached the hospital by taxi, was ushered into a waiting room where I have to change and took a medicine to clear my bowels.

Dilated 2cm when check-in, I requested for epidural at 4cm but the anaesthesia only came when I was 7cm. ** They will only allow epidural when they see you are fully dilated (benchmark varies for different nurses and doctors). Effects of epidural is not immediate it will take about 20 to 30 mins to take effect. Side effects of epidural are vomiting, shivering, low blood pressure.

I feel that we woman should have the right to know what we are getting into; the process, risks and how painful childbirth would be. Last time when I asked my mom she said she forgot because she don’t want to scare me. ‘Awhile over liao’ Hello, The lady beside my bed had a freaking 2 days of labour and she was so traumatised when I chatted with her. :( Even though I had a dramatic delivery, I was glad it didn’t last so long, I don’t have to go through the long labour.

3️⃣ Assistance to Push 🫷

Labour pain is a combination of menses pain + diarrhoea + lower back pain. Every wave of contractions arrived with gush of blood that soaked the sheets, it was mentally draining just to endure the pain. When the epidural finally came and it was time for me to push, I literally had no energy.

Doesn’t help when the nurse kept saying, I don’t know how to push. It was my first pregnancy with no experience and I felt nothing legs down after the epidural. I only push when the doctor told me to. They could see my baby’s head but he got stuck there for very long, so they helped by pushing my stomach for me! Like pushing an edamame, one nurse on each side still cannot come out. Aftermath was bruises on my stomach, I didn’t have piles from the pushing which most mummies feedback. I guess I really did not push right?

When the doctor proceed to use a scissor to snip my ‘v’, I freaked out, not because its painful (I couldn’t feel a thing from epi) Because he did it without warning, when I questioned him he said it tore by itself. Hmmm He did inform me when he burst the water bag. After 1 hr of unsuccessful pushing, with baby’s heartbeat is getting lower doctor suggested to go for caesarean. Therefore I have to be stitched up and pushed to operating theatre for another dose of epidural.

4️⃣ Request of Music in Operating Theatre 🎶

FYI, during the whole C-sec process, you will be awake and can chat with your doctor. I get to know later that you can request for your preferred music in the operating theatre. I think they had no time to set up the ether screen, I get to see the whole process of my caesarean. Yes I saw everything, just like Youtube. Amidst all the drama and chaos, my baby was safely in my arms that’s all that matters. For my case I was billed for natural and emergency c-sec delivery procedure which includes 2 dose of anaesthesia. 💰

5️⃣ Contractions continued after delivery 😖

After the epidural wore off I could feel the pain from the contractions, it was still so intense after birth. The doctor said it is the uterus contracting, I had to request for higher dosage of pain killer. The c-sec scar pain was still bearable as long as I don’t cough or laugh, contraction pain for me is 😩

6️⃣ Myth debunked on caesarean

After going through both natural and caesarean, I would say I’m pro-caesarean as it is quick and predictable. I wish I would listened to myself and be firm on my choice. My recovery was very good for all 3 births, I could walk myself to the toilet on day 1 and requested for early discharge. Only down side for me is the keloid scar and pouch above the cut, I’m comfortable with it now. I will show it to my kids when they ask. Wish to send the message that C-sec is a viable option, natural birth is NOT the only or best option. It is a personal preference. In the past, our grandparents and parents era C-sec could be dangerous as medical was not so advance. Now that cosmetic surgery is so common what’s more caesarean. Of course we do have to take note of the risks involve in surgery, looking at Singapore Hospitals and doctors standard I would say the risk is very minimal.

✨Hope my sharing will give you an alternate perspective of childbirth and help you in your planning. 📝 Feel free to comment!

Next will be on confinement food 🍽️, stay tune!

#RealTalk #birthplan #labourexperience