Two Under Two

🤍 When I had Elle I went back to work 4 weeks later I asked their dad if I could borrow $50 so I could get some more comfortable work shoes.. he told me his money was already accounted for… he was bringing in almost $1500 a week and we stayed with his mom, so there were no huge bills.. y’all this man couldn’t give me $50 because he wanted to buy a bunch of 🍃. I was so heartbroken and felt so worthless.

🤍 My girls dad has done a lot of things that affected me in the worst way and altered my brain chemistry for sure , but he has grown and changed for the better in many ways. As I stated before I didn’t know he was dealing with depression at the time. No we are not currently together and he wasn’t a jerk before we had kids he was actually the type to give me his last.. he as reverted back to that person as well. And he loves his kids more than anything I won’t take that from him, but so many moments just won’t allow me to feel the same and I’m sure.. I know for a fact there are things I’ve don’t that has altered his view of me as well.

🤍 I’m still learning and growing but I can say things have gotten better when it comes to my mental state and my ambitions and goals , I’m almost back to the girl I was before I fell in love . The girl I was with huge goals .. I’m a mother and I became a mother before I became a WOMAN (don’t let that go over your head) but now I’m 27 and I should’ve gotten it together a long time ago but I’m on the right path and I love that for me, my girls and our future selves.

#momlife #motherhood #twoundertwo #growthmindset #healing