Dear Mother; I need to Say This

My Christian beliefs bother my mother so badly that she started telling me “they are all judgmental and act the same. I said “I believe it’s a person’s character. Two people can be involved in the same religion yet they have two different mind sets.” She didn’t care for that answer.

She often places me in the same boat she was in at my age…. It’s impossible. This letter is for her, however I can never tell her this because she will tell me that I’m looking down on her.

Dear Mother,

I want to start off with saying that I greatly appreciate the sacrifices you have made for me through the years. You’ve always made sure I was feed, had clothes and a roof over my head. However; I’d appreciate it if you stopped being disrespectful to me.

I understand that when you tried going to church they weren’t kind to you; I understand why they treated you that way. Back then a single mother of two daughters whom had children out of wedlock by two different men wasn’t exactly considered normal over 20 years ago.

When you were 21 you got pregnant then again at age 27. Your path was extremely different than me. We have no similarities. At 21 I was in college, working hard to create the life I knew I wanted. At 26 I met my now husband and we ended up married a year later. Shortly after we found out we were expecting our first and I became a mother at age 28.

You see, I learned from your mistakes, that’s what your children are supposed to do. Learn from your mistakes in life and apply the lessons to their own life. I’ve never disrespected you because of your past, I don’t really talk about it with you at all. Please stop placing me in that same boat. I have been on a different boat than you since I was born.

I need you to stop disrespecting me. I don’t disrespect you, or try to scare you into thinking like me. I leave you alone and don’t put any thought into it. Why can’t you do the same for me? Why not respect me the same as I respect you. I need you to understand that we are not the same, we will never be the same. I’m not you, I’m glad I’m not you, I will never be like you. I need you to accept that and please be happier in life for your own sake. You are engaged to a wonderful man, you live in a beautiful home with 22 acres and horses. You can be happier with that, I don’t understand why trying to scare me is the only thing that brings you happiness. Please get help, I’ll be there to support you if you choose to.

Sincerely, your oldest

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