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This summer I had to make the most heartbreaking decision. I had to have an abortion with my first child. I felt pain, shame, guilt, and regret.
I wonder “what if I kept him” “I could have made it work”.
Everyone talks about how abortion works but I never hear anyone talk about how it changes you. While I was pregnant I became so attached to the thought of having this child. Everyone doubted me, they told me I wasn’t capable of giving life.
I was so attached I went and got ultrasounds almost every week. I even named him, saw the gender. I am trying to heal, trying to remember that things happen for a reason.
The reality is healing doesn’t happen as a one-and-done. It doesn’t have a destination. It has a journey.
ITS OKAY! To not be okay all of the time. Every one mourns differently and for different reasons.
Thank you for staying this long and reading my story.
#unaesthetic #livephoto #grief #abortion #griefjourney #griefawareness #lemon8diary #hellolemon8 #springaesthetic #dayinmylife