CHALLENGES of an Interracial Marriage (WEDDING) 😅

On multi-cultural weddings & parents expectations: OMG. I can't. The diversity in culture has got to be the most difficult (but also best part of multi-cultural weddings - but I'll talk about the good parts on another day. Today is about the hard parts.) I'm sorry, this post is going to be a bit more haphazard because I'm still emotional when thinking about it.

For those of you who are new here, welcome! I'm a Filipino who married a Chinese-Singaporean in Singapore. For those who know me from Manila, it’s always important for me to set context: The way marriages work here in Singapore is that you're married as soon as you get solemnized. Either at the #ROM (Registry of Marriage) or at your wedding ceremony itself (either religious or cultural). The ROM procedure only costs $46.00 so technically, you could get married under $50.00!!!

But to have a wedding is a different thing altogether.

Today's not about costs of weddings though, today I’m gonna share about different cultural expectations and how painful it is to be the couple in between. Many of our friends are from the same culture so it's a lot easier but not for us. In the Filipino culture, the man's family pays for the wedding, and the bride marries in. Traditional Chinese customs will also have it that part of the angpao you receive must go back to your mother.

​Can you imagine that today! How painful it must be if your husband is not very well off, or if you had to return back the angpao that was meant to offset the wedding expenses. There are many other customary differences such as the payment of dowry, the Chinese tea ceremony, that make decisions that involve money and customs very hard to compromise on.

If you think this big day is all for yourself - hold your horses! Check in with your fiancé and make sure that his parents aren't expecting something you're not used to. For me my immediate question to my fiancé was, I’m Filipino, but will your parents pay for the wedding? Will they contribute? How much? Do they expect all your relatives to be invited? Will you gatecrash and kidnap me from home too??

These are practical questions and very important

that you both have a consensus and not spend most of your wedding planning fighting about whose culture to follow. In the end, you're both marrying each other only.

Do you have tips and experience??

Comment down below! These are exciting times!

#interracialrelationship #coupleadvice #interracialmarriage #adulting101 #adultingwoes #CanShareMeh #RelationshipAdvice

#marriage #culture