3 years of dealing with toxic both PIL AND SIL

Hi lemons!!

I just wan to vent my frustration😭

I have been married for 3 freaking years. 1 year of living with in laws and is hell of roll coaster!!! They are super toxic to me...

Story begins with my pregnancy, i was preggy with my eldest child and throughout my pregnancy they have been consistently make me question my self worthy.

They will start saying that i am too young to be a good mother, my sister in law will be a better my mom than me that i should pass her my kid instead.

Shortly after I gave birth, they are super possessive of my elder child i totally understand because is the first child and is a boy (they traditional af) so i did not say anything much. But when my child turns 4 months old which mean i need go back work, so my kid is under my sister in law's care.

She begin to say things like "you dont fit to be xxxx mum! i take care of him day and night i fit to be his mom what attention have you given him? when u consistently need work"

I got commitments too but i tries to spend as much time as possible with my child but on another hand she will ever bring my kids hack go her place leading my eldest child is not close to me.

When my son turns 2, she got her wish come true. my son starting calling her gugu mummy. then my parents in law is there being so supportive about it. started saying that my child dont belongs to me i dont even get to make decision for my kid.

What is worse during my second pregnancy, my parents in laws started stopping my husband to go hospital with me for my pregnancy check because they said i already have experience what risk is there of my going alone.

So i started going up for follow up alone, slowly stop updating my husband about my checks and my body health because he also slowly seems to be unbothered by it. They started saying pregnant only mah, why cannot carry heavy stuff other woman pregnant can still go gym lift weights go for run. Ask me dont be weak. Slowly i developed pre natal depression. Then things got worst during my 2nd month of pregnancy. I was beaten up and got pushed by my husband many times. I pulled up with his nonsense because i dont want my child born with a father and what is worst my parents knew and said it is my fault because i went and argued with my husband. I mean like obviously is not my fault thats why i argued back (my husband is a freaking egoistic person.)

I am like a giving birth machine to my husband and my in laws. my in laws actively asking me to give birth to no. 3. At first say if No.3 is a boy pass it to my sil since she cannot conceive and she will give us money like wtf. recently asking me to strive for a girl.

Given in such situations i dont think any girl would want to have another child. I never ask for divorce already good enough. I really what else they want from me. They are super controlling and unreasonable🥲