ITE YEAR ONE @21?!

Before you come at me and say that I’m proud of it. I actually am proud of myself for still working hard to finish my education.

𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘:

I struggled as a teen at the age of 14. I know many people are going to say “Normal education also can’t complete”. I’m truly disappointed in my past actions but I can only move forward from here. I started going to school on and off when I was 14 and wasted so much time.

When I was 14, my mental health started to get bad because of personal reasons. I remember how I would take the bus to school but would be too afraid to get down from the bus. I developed severe anxiety of school because of, again circumstances which I can’t share.

To me, working was okay as long as I didn’t have to face the people in school. The things they said about me and things I’ve encountered were horrifying. I met some great people in school too, that encouraged me. Unfortunately, I’ve let them down and they’re no longer a part of my life.

When I was 16 I completely stopped going to school and worked all the way till I’m 20. These years weren’t wasted though, I developed experiences for portfolios and even took courses like digital marketing.

𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐨 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥:

It was such a random thought honestly, “I kinda like studying actually”. I just went to research how to take N levels privately and studied with whatever time I had left. Thankfully, I managed to get into ITE 🫶 I was quite happy with my results, I studied really hard but definitely could have done better.

𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐆𝐌𝐀:

The first day of school, teachers mentioned a few times about how people always say “it’s the end” the moment they hear “ITE”. I was just excited to go to school ngl 😇 I understand that many people say things like these but at the end of the day, I GET TO STUDY YAY 🙌.

𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥:

I was so nervous but excited, I haven’t made in person friends for so long(I was like a caveman). I remember the first day, I was overthinking so much.

“What if I get bullied”

“What if they hate me”

“What if I’m not good enough”

“What if people make fun of me for my age”

These thoughts circulated my brain the whole first week of school.

I remember the first day when I got to class, I sat at a random seat. Keep in mind I haven’t talked to another human being in so long. Someone sat beside me and all I could think about is “where did my social skills go”. At that point I still had severe anxiety of school so it was hard to communicate normally. I was actually shaking. So I tried to communicate with that someone with my phone notes app. “Hey, what was the teacher’s name”

He just answered me normally and we went on about with our day.

2 months later, he became one of my best friends in school and I reminded him of this experience. He told me how afraid he was because he thought that I couldn’t talk and was going to pull out hand signs.

It was quite hard to make friends, so I sat in the washroom stall until break ended. I had a panic attack and called my dad. He was so worried but encouraged me to try my best to go along with the day.

After 2 months, I finally settled down and got used to going to school and I’m actually so happy about it. I DID IT!

𝐖𝐚𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐚𝐝𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠:

It was hard to get used to going to school 5 days a week again. I actually slipped up a few times because I was so tired from work. Thankfully, I work from home now. It’s much easier to manage. I’m not earning as much as when I wasn’t schooling but I’m happy to be able to continue my studies.

𝐃𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡:

If I could turn back time, I would definitely choose to study properly. By now I would probably be in Uni but it’s too late to regret now. I’m glad that I chose to go back to school. My CA(class advisor) is also very encouraging ☺️ THANK GOD.

𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐈𝐍 𝐀𝐋𝐋:

I know it’s not easy to go through a different path. I have made many mistakes in this path but I believe that whatever path you choose, as long as you’re happy and your mental health is WELL. That’s all that matters.

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE!!!❤️❤️

(THANK YOU all for your kind words , it really warms my heart to see so many nice people ❤️❤️❤️❤️)

#storytime #dropout #school #mentalhealth #GirlTalk #RealTalk #singapore #ite