How to support your partner mentally?

Hi, I am Celest! And I have been in a relationship with my

partner for 4.5 years and going strong 💪🏻 but of course, every relationship comes with its struggles. We had our fair share of struggles, quarrels, fights and more.

We went through poly together, army and now conquering uni together in different schools. Although we still quarrel, fight and have our own set of difficulties, I’m glad to have a boyfriend that is so emotionally stable.

Coming from a family where I had my own struggles and pain growing up + lots of trauma throughout my life from people, I am mentally a mess a lot of times. But.. here are some tips for all you boyfriends out there, to better support your s/o

1. Be very patient

Your partner is probably already feeling at his or her worst state, blaming herself/himself, and mentally feeling horrible. The best thing you can do is to be patient. Give her time to process, to think through things, talk nicely instead of shouting or showing attitude. It really helps a lot when you are in a mess and someone is patient with you. It helps to process things better and a lot faster.

2. Tons of reassurance and love

My partner does a lot of small things (words of affirmation and gifts) like telling me that i deserve all the love in the world, i am the best person in the world and that he loves me for who i am. Occasionally, he gets me flowers, or my favourite cupcake, or bread for my breakfast for the next day. It helps me to feel so much better and one less thing to worry (what to eat for bfast the next day HAHAHA I take it seriously okay food is my fave).

3. Communication

I have to admit, I’m really not the best at communicating. I actually often shut down but my partner is always reminding me that if I shut down, nothing will get solved and it makes everything get worse. He will either suggest to give me some time until I am ready to share, or even messaging him my thoughts (since it makes things less awkward). All these small things make me feel like he values my opinions, which is really important to me coming from a family that invalidates 80% of the things I say.

And, to everyone out there who is struggling, you are not alone!! You deserve every bit of love and happiness 🤍