Breaking Down the Healing Process 💌

we toss the word “healing” around a lot these days.

but where do we start? what does it actually look like?

the healing process is complex (and different for everyone!) but it can be broken down into 3 basic parts:

1️⃣ making space for what is

healing is making space for the pain that exists after everything we’ve been through. it’s acknowledging the memories, feeling the hurt, embracing the grief, processing the loss. it’s seeing ourselves laid bare and vulnerable, and accepting our softness after years of enduring abuse with strength and resilience. it’s radical honesty, bearing the full discomfort of what has been forced down and away. healing is to see ourselves entirely, and accept ourselves entirely, no matter how broken and imperfect.

2️⃣ deconstruction

healing is saying goodbye to who trauma made us out to be. it’s grieving for our own selves, for the innocence that was lost. it’s renouncing the maladaptive coping mechanisms that keep us stuck. it’s forgiving ourselves for not knowing better at the time. it’s surrendering the weight we’re still carrying from the things we’ve been through - the burdens that were never ours to bear. it’s understanding the truth of where we came from, why we’re here now, and letting go of the person we had to be to survive (so we can become who we truly are, and need to be, to thrive)

3️⃣ becoming

healing is the birth of the self. it’s the arrival of new practices and new patterns that lead us down new paths. it’s constructing new ways of thinking, being, and doing that are to our benefit instead of our detriment. it is learning kindness as we unlearn harshness, learning compassion as we unlearn shame, learning love as we unlearn abuse. it’s discovering the miracles that come out of the messes. it’s finding life in death - the birth of the self within the death of the self.

but healing doesn’t happen in order! we cycle in between these phases again and again, experiencing them simultaneously as they play off each other.

wherever you are in the process, and whatever it looks like for you, i’m here to help! please feel welcome to say hi, and leave me your questions + thoughts in the comments!

#healingjourney #healingmotivation #wellnesstips #selflovejourney #lemon8creator #cptsd #healingmyself #selflove #healingjourney #growth