Godfidence! 2 Corinthians 10:12-18

Good Morning Beautiful Warriors of God!

I notice that my bible study devotion of the day and the devotional passage in my study bible corresponded well with each other so I decided to share with you all!

Today’s reading is 2 Corinthians 10:12-18. It’s basically Paul instructing the believers to not compare themselves with others, especially those who are boasting themselves up in pride. I thought this was such a fitting Word because I was planning on doing a post about what the Lord has been speaking to me about true femininity, my identity in him, and how to find my confidence in him. (Which I will be posting sometimes in the future).

I had a very unique upbringing growing up with two parents who was financially irresponsible and emotionally neglectful at times. Basically both of my parents didn’t work and relied on government assistance to raise me and my siblings and to take care of their needs too. They are two able bodied people, but chose to leave the workforce because they didn’t want to put up with the people and system anymore. I believe that deep down, the decision that they chose caused a lot of insecurities in me and my older brother that we are now coming to terms with.

At this point in my life at almost 27, I realize that in ways I wanted to be the girl with the bachelor degree, my own apartment, a great career, and multiple trips under my belt, but I realize that because of my upbringing, I’ve been slightly delayed. I have managed to get my associates degree, but I stopped there because I couldn’t afford to go into anymore debt and I don’t have any family members I can ask for financial support. I also have a hard time finding work in my field, and been working warehouse jobs just to have some form of income.

I mention all this to confess with you other believers, that honestly this has been a very hard struggle for me and it’s hard to not compare myself with others at times. Sometimes the enemy wants me to think… “if I had better parents who cared more and didn’t give up on themselves, maybe I could of gotten further by now.” But honestly it’s not their fault. I always say that our parents are just people who are fighting against the enemies tactics just like we all are. I just now understand that yes, it may take longer for me, or may be harder for me without the support that I sometimes need, but whatever seems impossible will be made possible with God. Currently God has been helping me make peace with the fact that I was delayed and wasn’t taught well about life by my parents, but I can come back from it all with his help!

God has shown me that everyone has their own lanes, their own different upbringing rather good or bad, and their own fight, and that that’s why we can never judge others based off of appearance. You never know if the reason why someone has it so good is because they’re coming from a background of praying family members that the Lord blessed with generational blessing or if they come from a background of family/ancestors who cursed God and now there’s generational curses delaying this generation. You just don’t know for sure. What I do know is, I won’t be delayed forever. I won’t be insecure of who I am and what my upbringing was like no matter how embarrassing some of it was, and I won’t be ashamed of the God who was there with me even through the roughest, most shameful of times. I love finding my confidence in him.

When you realize that Jesus died on the cross just for these very reasons, just for the fact that we are a mess of a people without him, it’s easier to accept your flaws because you know that this is the very reason you need him. My flaws and mistakes were to be expected all along and is nothing to be ashamed of or insecure about, because it was always inevitable to begin with. This is the start of true humility. Knowing that you are literally nothing without the help and love of Jesus Christ.

#christiangirl #christian #christianwomen #biblestudy #journaling