BREASTFEEDING CAUSED MY ECZEMA??

Before I start, I would like to say that I had no history of eczema nor sensitive skin.

During and after pregnancy, I'm sure all mummies will be thinking if they should breastfeed. I was the same as everyone, I wanted to breastfeed as I see it as a special bond with my baby only I could have. However, during my hospital stay, I have never once successfully latched my baby due to my short nipples. I saw a lactation consultant and sadly, she informed me that I will probably never be able to latch my baby. I even bought those suction cups from Shopee to extend my nipples but they totally flopped.

I have been exclusively pumping since Day 1 postpartum and gosh, it was super duper tiring!

As mentioned in my previous post, I was doing my confinement alone. I would pump for 30mins after feeding and settling baby, then it's time to wash and sterilize my pump parts and baby bottle. After I'm done with those, It's already time for my baby's next feed. I was on auto-pilot for a good 2 months because I was surviving on 30 minute naps throughout the day. 😵‍💫

One random day, I noticed and was horrified when I saw the infamous 'Pink Milk' coming out of my pump. By then, I was only exclusively pumping for 6-7 weeks. I saw that my right nipple was cracked and bleeding. No words can explain it but all I can say is that I was in excruciating pain, yet numb at the same time. I was not ready to stop breastfeeding my baby yet, so I bit my teeth and continue to produce 'Pink Milk' for the next 2 weeks.

My milk supply dipped for that 2 weeks and came to a complete stop. It might be due to the pain, my mind was not in a good place that it completely cut off my milk supply. I didn't want to but I had no choice but to stop breastfeeding. By then, my right nipple and my entire areola was cracked, the wound was so fresh and so raw.

I had let the wound heal after I stopped breastfeeding, but it never healed. I noticed that the wound would become dry, flaky, scaly and extremely itchy. The kind of itch that does not go away even after scratching. I had no control and I kept scratching even though I know not to. The wound was consistently peeling and bleeding daily. It was producing pus and my nipple was always stuck to my bra. I applied lotion, nipple cream, ice compress, but NOTHING worked. This went on for the next 4 months.

I started to realize that this was an issue and went to the polyclinic. I got referred to KKH to check for abnormalities in my breast. After doing an ultrasound and skin test. The doctors informed me that I had eczema, ON MY NIPPLE?? I have always thought that people only get eczema when they are young. I never thought that an adult could develop eczema. But I did.

As clueless as I am, I asked the doctor “When will this heal? Will it go away?” To my disappointment, the doctor told me that there is nothing we can do, and that I will have to live with this for the rest of my life

From that day on, I have to apply lotion every 2-3 hours daily to prevent itch. During flare ups, I was instructed to apply steroid cream. And so this is me now, 9 months post-pumping, with eczema. Every other day, I would still blame myself for not being able to breastfeed my baby, why so many mummies in the world can, yet not me? But I will always try to convince myself that it doesn't matter if my baby is breastfed or formula fed, as long as he is full and growing, I am a happy mummy!

Do let me know if there are other topics you would like to hear, I would love to share my experiences with more mummies out there!

#breastfeedingjourney #breastfeedingmom #exclusivelypumping #eczema