Shutting Down. Disassociating.

Vulnerability ~ Out of body

🤍 My Story: At this current phase of my life I have been in chronic stress and anxiety, not to mention depression. I found myself unable to be high functioning at my job position. In the middle of a task I would struggle to focus. The computer screen and buttons stopped making sense and was blurry. I fought to realign my focus and comprehend my urgent task at hand. The struggle was real and all too often. I’d have panic attacks before a shift. Having these glitches within myself was something I could not hide or conceal. My response was not only delayed by very slow. I’d get judgmental looks, or frustration even conflict from customers. I had no self control during these episodes no matter how hard I’d try.

Turns out my therapist explained I was under so much stress and confrontations from others that I was actually shutting down. Shutting down is my body trying to save me by the situation. It’s like an outer body experience. You just kind of blank out.

🤍 How I Felt: it’s disturbing when I can’t control myself and my response - because my body is shutting down for me; to protect me.

🤍 My Takeaways: I had to walk away from that job, too many red flags 🚩🚩🚩 it wasn’t even paying the bare minimum to pay my bills let alone the grief and stress I experienced at work. I can’t push through hardships like I used to.

Presently learning coping skills. Any coping skills advice is most welcomed. Thx for reading my story.📍 City/Country: Indianapolis

#disassociating #mentalhealth #mentalhealthjourney #therapy #outofbody #anxiety #depression #stress #quittingmyjob