Is money really a deal breaker in marriage?

A Straits Times article recently highlighted that 40% of couples say money is a major cause of tension in their relationships. And honestly, my wife and I are no different. We've had our share of financial stress, but we’ve learned that it’s not just about the money—it’s about how you communicate, share values, and trust each other.

Here are some key takeaways from our experience:

🗣️ Communication is Everything

Financial stress often hinders communication, especially for couples who avoid discussing it. For us, having early, open conversations about our finances has been crucial. When times were tough, we sat down and talked about what we could do together. It wasn’t always easy, but it brought us closer.

🎯 Different Views, Same Goals

My wife and I don’t always see eye-to-eye about money. She’s incredibly charitable, while I focus more on building financial stability for the future. Balancing these perspectives was a challenge at first, but we found ways to align our values. It’s about compromising and knowing that you’re both working towards a shared future.

✍️ Building Trust Through Accountability

Trust plays a massive role in how we handle our finances. We don’t discuss every little expense, but when it comes to big financial decisions, we make sure to involve each other. Whether it’s a large purchase or an investment, we always check in with each other. This way, we both feel like we have a say, and it helps avoid misunderstandings.

🐥 Modelling Healthy Money Habits for Our Kids

When we had a kid, we realised that we weren’t just managing money for ourselves anymore. We were modelling how to handle finances for her, too. We want her to grow up understanding the value of money, but also knowing that it doesn’t define her happiness or success. It’s something we’re still figuring out, but it’s important to us.

🙏 Gratitude Above All

At the end of the day, I’m thankful for the love and support my wife has shown me through thick and thin. We’ve built a life where money supports our goals, but it doesn’t control us. As the saying goes, “Wealth is a great servant, but a terrible master.”

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